Sometimes we have to be completely honest with ourselves and admit that we don't always trust our kids. We like to think that we do, but in honesty we really don't.
What do I mean by that?
Think about it, how often has your child come to you with an idea or a suggestion and you hear yourself saying something like, "Yes, I know dear, but...."
You know what?
Why not just trust your child? Instead of going with natural desire to want to protect our child and give them what we consider to be 'better' advice, why not just listen to your child's idea or suggestion...really listen! No interruptions, no suggestions, just open listening.
You will be amazed at what your child can create, come up with, consider, decide and do. Your child is an amazing human being, and she or he is the owner of their own body, mind and soul.
Trust that sometimes they actually do know instinctively what's best for them.
I teach mainly about how to teach our kids and teens about money, so let me give you an idea of how you can use this method in this area.
When your child comes to you to get an idea of how to earn some money, why not NOT give them any idea at all but instead turn it right back on them and ask HIM or HER what ideas he or she can come up with on their own.
And be open minded!
Unless their idea will absolutely cause themselves or anyone else actual harm, let them give it a go!
It may fail.
It probably will fail.
That's awesome!
The best way we ever learn anything in life is by our failures! There is WAY too much emphasis in our schools, in our societies to do everything humanly possible to NOT fail but why?
Think about it...why is it bad to fail?
Can you come up with any absolutely good reasons why we shouldn't fail? Isn't failing the best way you learned how to ride a bike? Didn't knowing what made you fall off your bike help you make sure you never fall of it again?
Do you know what the biggest failure of all is?
It's not allowing your child to fail!
When we focus only on success, and ignore our failures, we waste an incredible source of true learning. Think about it, think back to when you were in school, can you honestly remember those tests that you succeeded on? Do you remember what they were about?
If you're truly honest, you probably at best only remember a fraction of the stuff you succeeded at in school. But I bet that you absolutely remember the biggest mistakes you've ever made, right?
And it was from those mistakes that you learned and grew and became who you are today.
It's time to trust our kiddos to do the same.
I'm not saying to take back all of your protectiveness...I'm just saying take the time to listen to them and then let them make the safe mistakes...and be super proud of them when they learn their lessons and also when they make their successes!
So in terms of teaching your child about money, next time they ask you how they can do that, don't just tell them to run another lemonade stand...instead turn the question back on them and allow their creative genius to shine through!
Why knows, your child might be the next internet sensation! :D
Here's a cute example of one of the ideas my kiddos came up with to make money. In their case, they took a very sad moment in their lives and turned it into something that would help other children deal with their own sad moments.
Our sweet doggie passed away a few years ago and this is what my kiddos decided to create to help keep her memory alive, help other kids deal with the loss of their own pets AND support our local animal shelter!
If we allow ourselves to trust our kiddos' instincts we will be amazed at the great things they will come up with! :D
Grab your FREE copy of one of Amanda's 7 Great Tools to teach your child or teen about money, like her fun cartoon, “The 6 Magical Piggy Banks” or her "Goal-Setting for Families” workbook to enjoy together with your child to raise their financial consciousness and empower their self-esteem! Best-selling author, Amanda van der Gulik homeschooled her own two children for over 12 years and is the founder of www.TeachingChildrenAboutMoney.com. She has been a featured guest on Radio Disney Seattle and was featured in The Costco Connections Magazine both in Canada and the USA.
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