Both adults and kids live daily with some level of stress. Life is full of challenges. For adults these might be financial pressures, relationship problems, job-related issues and the like. The pressures in children’s lives may seem minor to us, but they are very real to them. Will they deal with their challenges, avoid them or simply cope passively with them?

Although parents often want to shield children from stress, it’s important to give them the opportunity to learn to manage life’s challenges little by little. Research shows that children in warm, loving and supportive homes are better able to cope with stress. A positive mindset can determine success or failure in handling difficult situations. “ I can do it in time and with help” is an excellent way to take on a challenge.

Ways to Promote Taking on Challenges

·         Parents must manage their own stress levels as they tend to spill over to children.

·         Don’t shield children from normal, everyday stresses.

·         Let your children know they are “in a safe place.”

·         Encourage your child to verbalize a problem and take ownership of a problem. “What could you do next time?”

·         Teach coping strategies such as counting, taking deep breaths, taking a time out, going to a quiet place—whatever helps in a stressful time.

·         Require accountability. When a plan has been made and not followed, work together to set consequences and make a new plan.

·         If your child is shy allow time to watch and observe before entering into new situation.

·         Promote the things your child is passionate about. Leadership grows as children operate in their area of strength.

·         Praise effort and strategies, not personality or intelligence. “You did a great job of matching that puzzle piece by using the color.”

·         Role play dangerous or problematic situations. Stranger danger, saying no to drugs, safe use of computers and phones.

·         Work through sample problems to gain a problem solving strategy. “How could we fix that broken toy?” Entertain all possible solutions and then try them to evaluate their success.

Your child will face his or her share of problems in life. Begin now to encourage a growth attitude—one that leads to taking responsibility and leads to an I can do it attitude.

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Jan Pierce, M.Ed., is a retired teacher and author of the book, Homegrown Readers: Simple Ways to Help Your Child Learn to Read. She specializes in education, parenting and family life articles. Find Jan at www.janpierce.net