A Parable; A Cautionary Tale
by Rachel DeMille
On the first day of school, the little boy waved to his mother and turned to run down the bright hallway to class. His teacher smiled and pointed out his desk. “This is going to be great,” he thought. “I love to learn new things.”
After a few fun stories, the teacher handed out crayons and paper and announced that it was time to draw a picture. The little boy enthusiastically grabbed the crayons and began to imagine all the things he could draw: mountains, lakes, airplanes, his family, his dog, the ocean, the stars at night…
Hundreds of ideas raced through his creative little mind.
His teacher, seeing that he was distracted, stopped him and said that today the class would be drawing flowers. The boy’s mind again ran wild: daisies, daffodils, roses, carnations, violets, lilacs, pansies, mixed bouquets, green gardens full of rainbows of colors…
The teacher again interrupted his thoughts, informing the class that today they would be drawing a certain kind of flower. Taking colored chalk, the teacher went to the board and drew a green stem, with two leaves, and four identical pink petals. The little boy, eager to please, dutifully copied her drawing.
After several attempts, his drawing looked exactly like hers.
The teacher congratulated him for doing such good work.
As the school year passed, the little boy became a very good student; he learned to listen, obey instructions and get the right answers on tests. His parents were very proud of him, and his teacher was impressed with his excellent progress.
When the next school year arrived, the boy had done so well in his classes that he was enrolled in an accelerated program. During the first week of class, the teacher handed out crayons and paper and announced that it was time to draw a picture. The little boy, still in love with art, enthusiastically picked up his crayons and waited for instructions.
After several minutes the teacher noticed that the little boy wasn’t drawing. “Why haven’t you started?” she asked. “Don’t you like to draw?”
“I love to draw,” responded the little boy, “but I was waiting for you to tell us what the assignment is.”
“Just draw whatever you want,” the teacher smiled and left the little boy to his creativity. The little boy sat for a long time, watching the minutes tick off the clock and wondering what he should draw. Nothing came to mind.
Finally, in a burst of creative inspiration, he picked up his crayons and began to draw:
A green stem, with two leaves, and four identical pink petals.
What’s the biggest problem with homeschoolers?
I was asked once, “What is the biggest problem with homeschoolers?” As I pondered on that question, Helen Buckley’s story of “The Little Boy,” retold above as it appears in our book A Thomas Jefferson Education, came to mind. First and foremost, even among "dyed in the wool" homeschoolers, I see the widespread neglect of the Core Phase.
We tend to press, steer and manipulate kids when they’re just tiny. Everyone around them seems frantic about their learning. They live in a state of tension. We give them tasks just ahead of their developmental stage and force them to reach for things that are uncomfortable. They feel stupid; they think they can only learn if someone else is telling them what comes next; they are urged to ignore their curiosity and follow the clock. By the time they should be moving into Love of Learning they either don’t have the will to try anymore or they have lost themselves in a world where they are born to please and to measure their worth based on the opinions of others—both peers and authority figures.
Children in conveyor-belt style schools (be they public, private, alternative or homeschool) receive a significant portion of their homework by the time they are twelve. Then in their teens they’re told, “Go to activities. Play sports. Enjoy these carefree years!" It’s 100% backwards. We need to facilitate a successful Core and Love of Learning, and keep the lessons of these Foundational Phases active in the hearts and minds of our older Scholar Phase students as they pursue the rigorous, world-class education they are optimally capable of as youth.
Core Phase Defined
So what, exactly, is Core Phase? At the center of each individual’s personality and development is the Core. While it must be maintained and nourished throughout a person’s life, the establishment of the Core begins between the years of 0-8. During Core Phase, critical lessons are learned and assumptions are made that define the individual’s concept of self, family, and the beginnings of their broader worldview. Attention should be given above all to the nurture of a happy, interactive, confident child through the lessons that occur naturally, with the methodology of work and play in the family setting.
The “curriculum” is of Core Phase includes:
When we put too much focus or pressure on precocious academic achievement during this phase it can
…teach our children that they dislike academics because everything is pushy, hard and boring, and/or
…offer our children an alternative source of self-measure other than faith, good works and accountability.
The lessons of the Core Phase are best learned through daily experiences in home life. The best effort of the parents is in modeling for the child an active spiritual and scholarly life, and in nurturing healthy relationships and personal development. This is an ideal time for reading, listening to, discussing and playing with classics. Little ones’ natural curiosity and fearlessness are undimmed; they view the world as a friendly and interesting place.
Self-discipline, perseverance and excellence are modeled by the parents and experienced by the child in mostly physical ways:
Little children start to internalize the virtues of excellence and perseverance as they do their part. They are taught the basics of the family’s faith, and how to define and recognize truth. The child is schooled in how to make choices, heed his conscience and to know in his heart when he’s being inspired. “Discipline” in Core Phase consists primarily of instruction, training and patient explanation and re-teaching of principles—rather than punishment, shame or anger.
Getting Out of our Rut
Due to our generation’s entrenchment in Conveyor Belt thinking and methods, there is widespread neglect of Core Phase. I believe this results from our tendency to identify so strongly with our label of "homeschoolers" that we are tempted to define our family culture by academic achievement. The good news is: Homeschoolers are in an excellent position to reclaim Core Phase for their families, and to deliver an excellent foundation for a great education and a great life in the process.
I remember when I had three little ones under the age of three, and knowing that I wanted to homeschool, how anxious I was to "get on with it.” I started reading when I was four, so I just assumed that my bright little kids would also find it easy. I considered that the measure of my success for a time; I was impatient and self-conscious and worried that I would fail.
Thankfully, our first child was one who would not be rushed. Because Little Oliver was more like his father (who did not read fluently until he was almost 12—and then later more than made up for “lost” time), we felt that it would be best for us not to emphasize reading as the skill by which they should measure their worth, intelligence, knowledge or ability to succeed in new endeavors. I purposely steered our "school" toward things that fortified the children as individuals and established our family culture, waiting for the cues that Oliver was ready (both developmentally and emotionally) to master reading. The happy result was that we discovered almost by accident the purpose of the Core Phase.
Because we tried to feed the spirit and the intellect of our young children on content rather than skills mastery, and because we waited until they were anxious to apply themselves to the task, our children (and many, many others I know who’ve been raised on this model) not only have that fearlessness that I referred to, but they have the innate sense that their education is their own responsibility. We are examples, mentors, guides and facilitators, but they do not expect us to educate them. They understand that it is their job to supply the desire and the effort necessary to achieve their personal, spiritual and educational goals. In a word, they own the responsibility to educate themselves.
I have witnessed many well-intentioned mothers and (particularly) fathers—ourselves not excluded—who feel the urge to pressure their children into structured time and activities that model public school settings and timetable. They cite the value of self-discipline and excellence as the reason for their strivings. I would suggest that these are internal values, and are not developed in an environment of compulsion. I also believe that it is difficult to teach such things without a physical medium that allows the student to see the workings of choice and consequence. By this I mean: Learning excellence is easier and teaching self-discipline is more effective when the child sees the natural consequences of his or her choices, as in:
"If I say that I weeded the garden, when I really didn’t:
1) Everyone will know it isn’t true;
2) I’ll have to do it later anyway;
3) It will be more difficult if I put it off.”
Activities such as caring for home, animals and gardens provide the routine, repetition, and reward that the child’s mind can grasp—and the principles learned in this way are readily and naturally applied to other arenas of life later on. These have been our methods of choice, but I know of another great family hat has used the father’s dental practice as their medium.
The children go early each morning with their parents to do the janitorial and other prep work for the day. It isn’t too difficult for a relatively young person to understand that they can’t cut corners when sterilizing dental equipment without serious repercussions; they learn to take pride in their cleaning when the professional appearance of the office directly affects the family’s well-being, reputation and prosperity. And the sense of purpose, camaraderie and worth attached to their labors feeds their souls.
In the examples I have given (and there are probably as many ways to teach these principles as there are parents reading this article) consequences are nearly immediate and the necessity of consistency and exactness become obvious as they experience the consequences of their choices. In this way the child learns self-discipline and excellence in a very personal and internal way. Then when he is older and is having a hard time mastering some math skill or wants to develop an article to submit to a magazine, no one needs preach to him what self-discipline or high standards of excellence will get him. He learned those lessons getting dirt under his fingernails when he was only seven.
TJEd is all about inspiring each student, about making education truly exciting and enticing for each individual learner. It promotes a well-delivered, phase-oriented and principle-based educational experience targeted to each individual child.
Next month we will consider Love of Learning Phase…
Until then, remember: An investment in your own education is not a withdrawal from your children’s. And if you need permission to take some time to read a quality book to yourself or your family, I’m happy to be the one to give it. Go read a book!
Warmly,
rd
Rachel DeMille is the editor of This Week in History , a daily offering for educators to correlate historical events with learning resources and activities in math, science, writing, geography and more. She is the author, with her husband Oliver DeMille, of the Thomas Jefferson Education educational resources . They have eight children. For more about Thomas Jefferson Education visit http://tjed.org.
by Rachel DeMille
On the first day of school, the little boy waved to his mother and turned to run down the bright hallway to class. His teacher smiled and pointed out his desk. “This is going to be great,” he thought. “I love to learn new things.”
After a few fun stories, the teacher handed out crayons and paper and announced that it was time to draw a picture. The little boy enthusiastically grabbed the crayons and began to imagine all the things he could draw: mountains, lakes, airplanes, his family, his dog, the ocean, the stars at night…
Hundreds of ideas raced through his creative little mind.
His teacher, seeing that he was distracted, stopped him and said that today the class would be drawing flowers. The boy’s mind again ran wild: daisies, daffodils, roses, carnations, violets, lilacs, pansies, mixed bouquets, green gardens full of rainbows of colors…
The teacher again interrupted his thoughts, informing the class that today they would be drawing a certain kind of flower. Taking colored chalk, the teacher went to the board and drew a green stem, with two leaves, and four identical pink petals. The little boy, eager to please, dutifully copied her drawing.
After several attempts, his drawing looked exactly like hers.
The teacher congratulated him for doing such good work.
As the school year passed, the little boy became a very good student; he learned to listen, obey instructions and get the right answers on tests. His parents were very proud of him, and his teacher was impressed with his excellent progress.
When the next school year arrived, the boy had done so well in his classes that he was enrolled in an accelerated program. During the first week of class, the teacher handed out crayons and paper and announced that it was time to draw a picture. The little boy, still in love with art, enthusiastically picked up his crayons and waited for instructions.
After several minutes the teacher noticed that the little boy wasn’t drawing. “Why haven’t you started?” she asked. “Don’t you like to draw?”
“I love to draw,” responded the little boy, “but I was waiting for you to tell us what the assignment is.”
“Just draw whatever you want,” the teacher smiled and left the little boy to his creativity. The little boy sat for a long time, watching the minutes tick off the clock and wondering what he should draw. Nothing came to mind.
Finally, in a burst of creative inspiration, he picked up his crayons and began to draw:
A green stem, with two leaves, and four identical pink petals.
What’s the biggest problem with homeschoolers?
I was asked once, “What is the biggest problem with homeschoolers?” As I pondered on that question, Helen Buckley’s story of “The Little Boy,” retold above as it appears in our book A Thomas Jefferson Education, came to mind. First and foremost, even among "dyed in the wool" homeschoolers, I see the widespread neglect of the Core Phase.
We tend to press, steer and manipulate kids when they’re just tiny. Everyone around them seems frantic about their learning. They live in a state of tension. We give them tasks just ahead of their developmental stage and force them to reach for things that are uncomfortable. They feel stupid; they think they can only learn if someone else is telling them what comes next; they are urged to ignore their curiosity and follow the clock. By the time they should be moving into Love of Learning they either don’t have the will to try anymore or they have lost themselves in a world where they are born to please and to measure their worth based on the opinions of others—both peers and authority figures.
Children in conveyor-belt style schools (be they public, private, alternative or homeschool) receive a significant portion of their homework by the time they are twelve. Then in their teens they’re told, “Go to activities. Play sports. Enjoy these carefree years!" It’s 100% backwards. We need to facilitate a successful Core and Love of Learning, and keep the lessons of these Foundational Phases active in the hearts and minds of our older Scholar Phase students as they pursue the rigorous, world-class education they are optimally capable of as youth.
Core Phase Defined
So what, exactly, is Core Phase? At the center of each individual’s personality and development is the Core. While it must be maintained and nourished throughout a person’s life, the establishment of the Core begins between the years of 0-8. During Core Phase, critical lessons are learned and assumptions are made that define the individual’s concept of self, family, and the beginnings of their broader worldview. Attention should be given above all to the nurture of a happy, interactive, confident child through the lessons that occur naturally, with the methodology of work and play in the family setting.
The “curriculum” is of Core Phase includes:
- Right/wrong
- Good/bad
- True/false
- Relationships
- Family values
- Family routines and responsibilities
- Learning accountability
- The value and love of work
- “What is success?”
- “What is an adult?”
- “How do I resolve conflict?”
- “What is home?”
- “What is my relationship with God?”
- “What is my relationship with others?”
- “What is my duty?”
- …and so forth.
When we put too much focus or pressure on precocious academic achievement during this phase it can
…teach our children that they dislike academics because everything is pushy, hard and boring, and/or
…offer our children an alternative source of self-measure other than faith, good works and accountability.
The lessons of the Core Phase are best learned through daily experiences in home life. The best effort of the parents is in modeling for the child an active spiritual and scholarly life, and in nurturing healthy relationships and personal development. This is an ideal time for reading, listening to, discussing and playing with classics. Little ones’ natural curiosity and fearlessness are undimmed; they view the world as a friendly and interesting place.
Self-discipline, perseverance and excellence are modeled by the parents and experienced by the child in mostly physical ways:
- Chores
- Animals
- Gardens
- Family Business
- Daily Routine
Little children start to internalize the virtues of excellence and perseverance as they do their part. They are taught the basics of the family’s faith, and how to define and recognize truth. The child is schooled in how to make choices, heed his conscience and to know in his heart when he’s being inspired. “Discipline” in Core Phase consists primarily of instruction, training and patient explanation and re-teaching of principles—rather than punishment, shame or anger.
Getting Out of our Rut
Due to our generation’s entrenchment in Conveyor Belt thinking and methods, there is widespread neglect of Core Phase. I believe this results from our tendency to identify so strongly with our label of "homeschoolers" that we are tempted to define our family culture by academic achievement. The good news is: Homeschoolers are in an excellent position to reclaim Core Phase for their families, and to deliver an excellent foundation for a great education and a great life in the process.
I remember when I had three little ones under the age of three, and knowing that I wanted to homeschool, how anxious I was to "get on with it.” I started reading when I was four, so I just assumed that my bright little kids would also find it easy. I considered that the measure of my success for a time; I was impatient and self-conscious and worried that I would fail.
Thankfully, our first child was one who would not be rushed. Because Little Oliver was more like his father (who did not read fluently until he was almost 12—and then later more than made up for “lost” time), we felt that it would be best for us not to emphasize reading as the skill by which they should measure their worth, intelligence, knowledge or ability to succeed in new endeavors. I purposely steered our "school" toward things that fortified the children as individuals and established our family culture, waiting for the cues that Oliver was ready (both developmentally and emotionally) to master reading. The happy result was that we discovered almost by accident the purpose of the Core Phase.
Because we tried to feed the spirit and the intellect of our young children on content rather than skills mastery, and because we waited until they were anxious to apply themselves to the task, our children (and many, many others I know who’ve been raised on this model) not only have that fearlessness that I referred to, but they have the innate sense that their education is their own responsibility. We are examples, mentors, guides and facilitators, but they do not expect us to educate them. They understand that it is their job to supply the desire and the effort necessary to achieve their personal, spiritual and educational goals. In a word, they own the responsibility to educate themselves.
I have witnessed many well-intentioned mothers and (particularly) fathers—ourselves not excluded—who feel the urge to pressure their children into structured time and activities that model public school settings and timetable. They cite the value of self-discipline and excellence as the reason for their strivings. I would suggest that these are internal values, and are not developed in an environment of compulsion. I also believe that it is difficult to teach such things without a physical medium that allows the student to see the workings of choice and consequence. By this I mean: Learning excellence is easier and teaching self-discipline is more effective when the child sees the natural consequences of his or her choices, as in:
"If I say that I weeded the garden, when I really didn’t:
1) Everyone will know it isn’t true;
2) I’ll have to do it later anyway;
3) It will be more difficult if I put it off.”
Activities such as caring for home, animals and gardens provide the routine, repetition, and reward that the child’s mind can grasp—and the principles learned in this way are readily and naturally applied to other arenas of life later on. These have been our methods of choice, but I know of another great family hat has used the father’s dental practice as their medium.
The children go early each morning with their parents to do the janitorial and other prep work for the day. It isn’t too difficult for a relatively young person to understand that they can’t cut corners when sterilizing dental equipment without serious repercussions; they learn to take pride in their cleaning when the professional appearance of the office directly affects the family’s well-being, reputation and prosperity. And the sense of purpose, camaraderie and worth attached to their labors feeds their souls.
In the examples I have given (and there are probably as many ways to teach these principles as there are parents reading this article) consequences are nearly immediate and the necessity of consistency and exactness become obvious as they experience the consequences of their choices. In this way the child learns self-discipline and excellence in a very personal and internal way. Then when he is older and is having a hard time mastering some math skill or wants to develop an article to submit to a magazine, no one needs preach to him what self-discipline or high standards of excellence will get him. He learned those lessons getting dirt under his fingernails when he was only seven.
TJEd is all about inspiring each student, about making education truly exciting and enticing for each individual learner. It promotes a well-delivered, phase-oriented and principle-based educational experience targeted to each individual child.
Next month we will consider Love of Learning Phase…
Until then, remember: An investment in your own education is not a withdrawal from your children’s. And if you need permission to take some time to read a quality book to yourself or your family, I’m happy to be the one to give it. Go read a book!
Warmly,
rd
Rachel DeMille is the editor of This Week in History , a daily offering for educators to correlate historical events with learning resources and activities in math, science, writing, geography and more. She is the author, with her husband Oliver DeMille, of the Thomas Jefferson Education educational resources . They have eight children. For more about Thomas Jefferson Education visit http://tjed.org.
