by Lisa McKenzie
Many times adults who are working with children get upset when children don’t act quite the way adults would like. Adults experience different emotions when the behavior of children in their care is not quite optimal, or when the behavior of children may be described as uncontrolled or ‘bad’.
Adults want children to listen and follow along with everything that the adults wants the child to do in order for the adults to be happy and content. The emotional response from adults toward children whose behavior isn’t the best is difficult for adults to control. There are a number of tools, such as composure and encouragement, for adults to use to redirect their emotional responses to a much more positive response towards these children. Many times adults want certain behaviors to be present when working with children because it makes the experience of the adults much more pleasant, which is what we want. We want pleasant experiences.
However, children have a variety of life experiences that cause their behavior to be less than positive and optimal. There are many times that children experience stress in their personal lives. Sometimes parents and family members are in a rush because of a busy lifestyle. Sometimes parents and family have financial challenges in their lives. Sometimes parents and family members have difficulty getting along, so children are exposed to parents who argue and yell at each other. The divorce rate today is high because parents’ inability to get along while living together. There can be many different stressful situations that children are exposed to, sometimes on a daily basis. When children come to school in the mornings after being in a stressful home environment, they tend to act out how they are feeling in their school environment. Many times, teachers and adults at schools don’t have any awareness about the stressful situations that children have just experienced at home. Consequently, adults in the school environment feel stress and create a stressful environment in the classroom. Children become products of bouncing back and forth between a stressful and chaotic home environment, and a stressful and unsafe school environment. They may feel like everywhere they go, there is no feelings of connection, love and peace. Children thrive in an environment where they feel connected and are a welcome part of a whole family or community.
What many adults don’t have an awareness of is that each one of them is a product of their own environments when they were young children. When each adult was a very small child between the ages of 0 and 6 years old, he or she felt everything from everyone in the environment in which he or she lived, including the home and other environments. Small children feel everything instead of having a real understanding of what is going on. Small children feel whatever adults and others present to the child are feeling. If adults in the child’s environment are feeling anger, fear, and unworthiness, that is what the child is also feeling. It may feel like an absence of love to the child. Small children feel like there is something wrong with them. They feel that they did something wrong, or that the situation is their fault. These feelings and emotions become internalized and the child grows up to be an adult with these same feelings. The adult then is living his life from this emotional state. Adults that many times unconsciously feel these ways about themselves, pass these same feelings onto young children in their presence and care without really understanding what is happening.
If adults had an awareness of this process, of these emotions that are being passed along from one generation to the next, they would have an opportunity to process these emotions that many times feel unloving, or chaotic, or not joyful. Adults who are able to process these unpleasant feelings then are able to provide an environment for young children that is filled with love and nurturing. These children grow up to be adults who feel a sense of worth and possess high levels of self-esteem. They are high functioning individuals who create environments for others that are loving and heart-centered without criticism, judgment, and hatred. These children grow up being truly able to love others. They are role models for members of a society that has a focus of creating peace in the world.
I have been trained and have experience working with adults to assist them to process old emotional baggage, negative emotion that they have been holding onto since early childhood in order to create feelings of love, joy and peace within.
Lisa McKenzie is a teacher with an Arizona state certification for Kindergarten through 8th grade. Lisa has many years of experience teaching many different ages and grades, from toddlers through high school. She enjoys working and interacting with children of all age groups. Lisa believes that building a foundation of values from an early age and continuing an ongoing practice of these values improves the ability to learn as well as creating a strong basis in which to live a fulfilling and enriched life. Lisa also teaches skills for parents and adults in order to positively respond to children instead of reacting.
lmckenzieatpeace@msn.com
602-579-9461
Many times adults who are working with children get upset when children don’t act quite the way adults would like. Adults experience different emotions when the behavior of children in their care is not quite optimal, or when the behavior of children may be described as uncontrolled or ‘bad’.
Adults want children to listen and follow along with everything that the adults wants the child to do in order for the adults to be happy and content. The emotional response from adults toward children whose behavior isn’t the best is difficult for adults to control. There are a number of tools, such as composure and encouragement, for adults to use to redirect their emotional responses to a much more positive response towards these children. Many times adults want certain behaviors to be present when working with children because it makes the experience of the adults much more pleasant, which is what we want. We want pleasant experiences.
However, children have a variety of life experiences that cause their behavior to be less than positive and optimal. There are many times that children experience stress in their personal lives. Sometimes parents and family members are in a rush because of a busy lifestyle. Sometimes parents and family have financial challenges in their lives. Sometimes parents and family members have difficulty getting along, so children are exposed to parents who argue and yell at each other. The divorce rate today is high because parents’ inability to get along while living together. There can be many different stressful situations that children are exposed to, sometimes on a daily basis. When children come to school in the mornings after being in a stressful home environment, they tend to act out how they are feeling in their school environment. Many times, teachers and adults at schools don’t have any awareness about the stressful situations that children have just experienced at home. Consequently, adults in the school environment feel stress and create a stressful environment in the classroom. Children become products of bouncing back and forth between a stressful and chaotic home environment, and a stressful and unsafe school environment. They may feel like everywhere they go, there is no feelings of connection, love and peace. Children thrive in an environment where they feel connected and are a welcome part of a whole family or community.
What many adults don’t have an awareness of is that each one of them is a product of their own environments when they were young children. When each adult was a very small child between the ages of 0 and 6 years old, he or she felt everything from everyone in the environment in which he or she lived, including the home and other environments. Small children feel everything instead of having a real understanding of what is going on. Small children feel whatever adults and others present to the child are feeling. If adults in the child’s environment are feeling anger, fear, and unworthiness, that is what the child is also feeling. It may feel like an absence of love to the child. Small children feel like there is something wrong with them. They feel that they did something wrong, or that the situation is their fault. These feelings and emotions become internalized and the child grows up to be an adult with these same feelings. The adult then is living his life from this emotional state. Adults that many times unconsciously feel these ways about themselves, pass these same feelings onto young children in their presence and care without really understanding what is happening.
If adults had an awareness of this process, of these emotions that are being passed along from one generation to the next, they would have an opportunity to process these emotions that many times feel unloving, or chaotic, or not joyful. Adults who are able to process these unpleasant feelings then are able to provide an environment for young children that is filled with love and nurturing. These children grow up to be adults who feel a sense of worth and possess high levels of self-esteem. They are high functioning individuals who create environments for others that are loving and heart-centered without criticism, judgment, and hatred. These children grow up being truly able to love others. They are role models for members of a society that has a focus of creating peace in the world.
I have been trained and have experience working with adults to assist them to process old emotional baggage, negative emotion that they have been holding onto since early childhood in order to create feelings of love, joy and peace within.
Lisa McKenzie is a teacher with an Arizona state certification for Kindergarten through 8th grade. Lisa has many years of experience teaching many different ages and grades, from toddlers through high school. She enjoys working and interacting with children of all age groups. Lisa believes that building a foundation of values from an early age and continuing an ongoing practice of these values improves the ability to learn as well as creating a strong basis in which to live a fulfilling and enriched life. Lisa also teaches skills for parents and adults in order to positively respond to children instead of reacting.
lmckenzieatpeace@msn.com
602-579-9461
